Ship: Midousuji & Manami Fandom: Yowamushi Pedal Major Tags: None Other Tags: Mention of injury/illness, Talk of death/suicide (kinda?), not anywhere as grim as it sounds Square: why are we alive Word Count: 690
I thought this was going to turn out angsty but as soon as I started that went out the window. All for the best!
***
Midousuji’s energy deserted him abruptly after the peak. He retained the strength to steer himself safely to the side of the road and collapse on the grassy verge. He didn’t need to do anything more than that.
As of a few hundred meters back, their unofficial score stood at two victories each. For a moment he thought Manami had kept coasting down the road without him, at least until his opponent flopped down beside him, head resting against his shoulder.
Manami’s breathing sounded raw. Every three or four breaths it would catch in something like a laugh. Midousuji thought once again that there was something wrong with the climbers in his cohort. The few that could keep up enjoyed it way too much. It was creepy.
“I though my heart was going to burst.”
“You should make it so easy for me.”
Manami really did laugh at that. “You wouldn’t like it if I took it easy on you! I don’t like having you fall before we’re done with each other, either.”
Midousuji knew it was true, but he scoffed anyway. “I’m sure your team is quietly praying I drop dead so I can’t challenge them again. You must be the only crazy one.”
“No one on my team is that weak,” Manami snapped. It was so difficult to provoke Manami that success was startling, and even that gasp of anger was gone by his next breath. “Besides, knowing you, you’d keep going just to spite anyone who didn’t want you to.”
“So that’s what I’m living for? Spite?” Midousuji put one hand over his face, spread fingers cutting up the sky. He would break apart everything that stood before him and write his name in the rubble. “That sounds good.”
Manami had turned so that Midousuji felt breath on his neck, and the feeling that spread along his skin wasn’t anything like spite. Sometimes Manami touched him (sometimes it was only Manami’s breath or his voice or that crazy smile that touched him) and he wanted to be touched more. The part of him that dealt in cold logic said asking for more was playing into someone else’s hands.
“Or are you saying that once I run out of rivals I won’t have a reason to keep living?”
Manami didn’t answer that. Midousuji listened carefully to the quality of his silence. Both of their breathing had settled and deepened, and Manami was listening too. Midousuji might call that waiting silence ‘curiosity’ but it sure had a lot of interesting sharp edges for him to poke.
“Think once I completely defeat you I’ll go quietly to the other side?”
“I died before,” Manami stated, perfectly matter-of-fact.
“You died.” Midousuji saturated the words with scorn. It might well be that angels were beautiful and not to be trusted, but he still wouldn’t believe that Manami was one of them.
“My heart stopped, anyway. I don’t really remember how it felt now. So I think dying must not be that interesting.” He paused for a few seconds before adding in a lighter tone, “It hurt after they woke me up.”
The punch line was supposed to be that he didn’t need Manami to live, a petty response for Manami saying “knowing you,” but now Manami had dragged them far enough off track that delivering it wouldn’t have much effect. Now he could see it never would have had the desired effect at all.
When he didn’t say anything, Manami’s fingers bushed his forehead and then moved up to rub at his freshly buzzed hair.
Midousuji had learned from experience that if Manami really wanted to touch he wouldn’t want to stop for a while. He swatted at the hand and drawled out, “Ma-na-mi,” in a threat that never failed to make the other boy grin.
Manami rolled into him, forehead to forehead and nose to nose.
“Being alive is better.”
Midousuji could never get used to what happened to Manami’s eyes when he calmed down. They held the pure, terrifying sincerity of one who acts without thinking, and Midousuji rolled his eyes away from that kind gaze.
FILL: TEAM GRANDSTAND, A2, G
Fandom: Yowamushi Pedal
Major Tags: None
Other Tags: Mention of injury/illness, Talk of death/suicide (kinda?), not anywhere as grim as it sounds
Square: why are we alive
Word Count: 690
I thought this was going to turn out angsty but as soon as I started that went out the window. All for the best!
***
Midousuji’s energy deserted him abruptly after the peak. He retained the strength to steer himself safely to the side of the road and collapse on the grassy verge. He didn’t need to do anything more than that.
As of a few hundred meters back, their unofficial score stood at two victories each. For a moment he thought Manami had kept coasting down the road without him, at least until his opponent flopped down beside him, head resting against his shoulder.
Manami’s breathing sounded raw. Every three or four breaths it would catch in something like a laugh. Midousuji thought once again that there was something wrong with the climbers in his cohort. The few that could keep up enjoyed it way too much. It was creepy.
“I though my heart was going to burst.”
“You should make it so easy for me.”
Manami really did laugh at that. “You wouldn’t like it if I took it easy on you! I don’t like having you fall before we’re done with each other, either.”
Midousuji knew it was true, but he scoffed anyway. “I’m sure your team is quietly praying I drop dead so I can’t challenge them again. You must be the only crazy one.”
“No one on my team is that weak,” Manami snapped. It was so difficult to provoke Manami that success was startling, and even that gasp of anger was gone by his next breath. “Besides, knowing you, you’d keep going just to spite anyone who didn’t want you to.”
“So that’s what I’m living for? Spite?” Midousuji put one hand over his face, spread fingers cutting up the sky. He would break apart everything that stood before him and write his name in the rubble. “That sounds good.”
Manami had turned so that Midousuji felt breath on his neck, and the feeling that spread along his skin wasn’t anything like spite. Sometimes Manami touched him (sometimes it was only Manami’s breath or his voice or that crazy smile that touched him) and he wanted to be touched more. The part of him that dealt in cold logic said asking for more was playing into someone else’s hands.
“Or are you saying that once I run out of rivals I won’t have a reason to keep living?”
Manami didn’t answer that. Midousuji listened carefully to the quality of his silence. Both of their breathing had settled and deepened, and Manami was listening too. Midousuji might call that waiting silence ‘curiosity’ but it sure had a lot of interesting sharp edges for him to poke.
“Think once I completely defeat you I’ll go quietly to the other side?”
“I died before,” Manami stated, perfectly matter-of-fact.
“You died.” Midousuji saturated the words with scorn. It might well be that angels were beautiful and not to be trusted, but he still wouldn’t believe that Manami was one of them.
“My heart stopped, anyway. I don’t really remember how it felt now. So I think dying must not be that interesting.” He paused for a few seconds before adding in a lighter tone, “It hurt after they woke me up.”
The punch line was supposed to be that he didn’t need Manami to live, a petty response for Manami saying “knowing you,” but now Manami had dragged them far enough off track that delivering it wouldn’t have much effect. Now he could see it never would have had the desired effect at all.
When he didn’t say anything, Manami’s fingers bushed his forehead and then moved up to rub at his freshly buzzed hair.
Midousuji had learned from experience that if Manami really wanted to touch he wouldn’t want to stop for a while. He swatted at the hand and drawled out, “Ma-na-mi,” in a threat that never failed to make the other boy grin.
Manami rolled into him, forehead to forehead and nose to nose.
“Being alive is better.”
Midousuji could never get used to what happened to Manami’s eyes when he calmed down. They held the pure, terrifying sincerity of one who acts without thinking, and Midousuji rolled his eyes away from that kind gaze.
“I never said it wasn’t.”