He’s let Rin go before, unknowingly. The last time he went to Australia he had absolutely no choice, just letters to send and mope over the lack of a returned gesture.
He’s older now, more sure of himself, and maybe braver. Well. Only a little, since he hasn’t managed to force the words out yet, and Sousuke realizes he’s very clearly running out of time. Going to the airport with Rin was a given, and the Matsuokas knew that, too – no one had blinked at Sousuke fitting into the car as well, he and Rin in the backseat, Kou and their mother in the front.
Rin’s bags are already checked. He has some time before security, and Sousuke – Sousuke really needs to tell him the truth.
“Can I borrow you for a second?” he manages to ask, low and nervous. Kou gives him a pointed look, and Sousuke frowns at her – of course she knows. She probably always has. It isn’t fair.
“Sure,” Rin says, easily, if not a bit curiously. Sousuke tugs on his arm just slightly, off towards some more secluded area – that’s hard to come by, and. Well. He should have said something earlier.
“Rin,” it’s not easy to swallow past his nerves, but he tries, “there’s something I want to say.”
Rin folds his arms, expectant, and gives him the nod to go ahead. Sousuke wishes this was easier, wishes he wasn’t so embarrassed to be taking even a moment away from his family.
“I don’t want to tie you down while you’re over there. You could find someone you really like, and that’d be okay, but – I don’t think they’ll ever feel how I do about you. It’s been a long time, and I’m sorry I didn’t say this sooner, I’m sorry I’m saying it now, but. I love you, Rin.” He adds, silently, ‘please don’t cry’.
Sousuke finds himself being pulled very abruptly into a hug – or rather, Rin just flings himself on Sousuke and puts his arms around his neck and there are definitely no sniffling sounds there, at all. Sousuke feels fairly helpless to do anything but wrap his arms around him in kind. “I knew it.”
That’s not… exactly what Sousuke wanted to hear, but it’s not a bad thing, maybe? He hopes. But then Rin starts laughing, or at least it seems like it, and Sousuke suddenly has no idea what to make of anything. He pulls back some, frowning, to see Rin’s expression – he’s teary-eyed, but smiling, and Sousuke… has trouble really thinking straight in the face of that; he’s too handsome, too open, and it makes his heart flip.
“I just – kinda figured, since we were kids, but you never said anything in your letters and I didn’t know, if you still… when I came back, and all. Even if it seemed like it.”
Sousuke sort of wants to punch him for that, because as much as he’s embarrassed and maybe a little frustrated over how obvious he was, it’s such a stupid worry – of course he still felt that way. He doesn’t know how it could stop.
“Yeah, well. You were right.” His jaw’s clenched a little, feeling uncomfortably scrutinized and wishing Rin would just give him some kind of /answer/ –
“Guess so. And you don’t have to look so upset. I love you, too. Since we were kids and you were a brat who never stopped being stubborn.”
– oh.
His cheeks go red, he’s pretty sure, and even though Sousuke isn’t going to cry, he wants to. Instead, he reaches out to thread his fingers with Rin’s, squeezing his hand tight and getting one back without any delay.
“I’m still stubborn.”
“I know,” Rin says, but there’s nothing but a fond sigh attached to his tone, “and you still barely understand teamwork, but we’ll work on it.”
That sounds nice to him. Maybe he was slow on the uptake for what kind of meaning a relay has, but he does want the rest of his life to be working with and alongside Rin, so he may need the practice.
“Sorry, though. It’s kind of – unfair to say I’d like you more than anybody in Australia.” … Even if he still feels like it’s true.
Rin just laughs, dropping his forehead against Sousuke’s collarbone and shaking it back and forth – nuzzling?
“I wasn’t gonna look, anyway, Sousuke.”
Ahh. Well. At least he’s not the only one.
They squeeze hands once more, heading back to Rin’s family with them still linked – Kou rolls her eyes, but she’s happy, and his mom just smiles so knowingly that Sousuke knows the back of his neck goes red.
There’s a silent agreement between he and Rin that, however tempting, their first kiss can wait until the next visit, when there’s no need to rush. Sousuke can endure that wait, probably, just as he can endure the gentle teasing from the Matsuokas during the car ride back.
FILL: TEAM AKASHI SEIJUUROU/NIJIMURA SHUUZOU, G
Word Count: 843
He’s let Rin go before, unknowingly. The last time he went to Australia he had absolutely no choice, just letters to send and mope over the lack of a returned gesture.
He’s older now, more sure of himself, and maybe braver. Well. Only a little, since he hasn’t managed to force the words out yet, and Sousuke realizes he’s very clearly running out of time.
Going to the airport with Rin was a given, and the Matsuokas knew that, too – no one had blinked at Sousuke fitting into the car as well, he and Rin in the backseat, Kou and their mother in the front.
Rin’s bags are already checked. He has some time before security, and Sousuke – Sousuke really needs to tell him the truth.
“Can I borrow you for a second?” he manages to ask, low and nervous. Kou gives him a pointed look, and Sousuke frowns at her – of course she knows. She probably always has. It isn’t fair.
“Sure,” Rin says, easily, if not a bit curiously. Sousuke tugs on his arm just slightly, off towards some more secluded area – that’s hard to come by, and. Well. He should have said something earlier.
“Rin,” it’s not easy to swallow past his nerves, but he tries, “there’s something I want to say.”
Rin folds his arms, expectant, and gives him the nod to go ahead. Sousuke wishes this was easier, wishes he wasn’t so embarrassed to be taking even a moment away from his family.
“I don’t want to tie you down while you’re over there. You could find someone you really like, and that’d be okay, but – I don’t think they’ll ever feel how I do about you. It’s been a long time, and I’m sorry I didn’t say this sooner, I’m sorry I’m saying it now, but. I love you, Rin.” He adds, silently, ‘please don’t cry’.
Sousuke finds himself being pulled very abruptly into a hug – or rather, Rin just flings himself on Sousuke and puts his arms around his neck and there are definitely no sniffling sounds there, at all. Sousuke feels fairly helpless to do anything but wrap his arms around him in kind.
“I knew it.”
That’s not… exactly what Sousuke wanted to hear, but it’s not a bad thing, maybe? He hopes.
But then Rin starts laughing, or at least it seems like it, and Sousuke suddenly has no idea what to make of anything. He pulls back some, frowning, to see Rin’s expression – he’s teary-eyed, but smiling, and Sousuke… has trouble really thinking straight in the face of that; he’s too handsome, too open, and it makes his heart flip.
“I just – kinda figured, since we were kids, but you never said anything in your letters and I didn’t know, if you still… when I came back, and all. Even if it seemed like it.”
Sousuke sort of wants to punch him for that, because as much as he’s embarrassed and maybe a little frustrated over how obvious he was, it’s such a stupid worry – of course he still felt that way. He doesn’t know how it could stop.
“Yeah, well. You were right.” His jaw’s clenched a little, feeling uncomfortably scrutinized and wishing Rin would just give him some kind of /answer/ –
“Guess so. And you don’t have to look so upset. I love you, too. Since we were kids and you were a brat who never stopped being stubborn.”
– oh.
His cheeks go red, he’s pretty sure, and even though Sousuke isn’t going to cry, he wants to. Instead, he reaches out to thread his fingers with Rin’s, squeezing his hand tight and getting one back without any delay.
“I’m still stubborn.”
“I know,” Rin says, but there’s nothing but a fond sigh attached to his tone, “and you still barely understand teamwork, but we’ll work on it.”
That sounds nice to him. Maybe he was slow on the uptake for what kind of meaning a relay has, but he does want the rest of his life to be working with and alongside Rin, so he may need the practice.
“Sorry, though. It’s kind of – unfair to say I’d like you more than anybody in Australia.” … Even if he still feels like it’s true.
Rin just laughs, dropping his forehead against Sousuke’s collarbone and shaking it back and forth – nuzzling?
“I wasn’t gonna look, anyway, Sousuke.”
Ahh. Well. At least he’s not the only one.
They squeeze hands once more, heading back to Rin’s family with them still linked – Kou rolls her eyes, but she’s happy, and his mom just smiles so knowingly that Sousuke knows the back of his neck goes red.
There’s a silent agreement between he and Rin that, however tempting, their first kiss can wait until the next visit, when there’s no need to rush. Sousuke can endure that wait, probably, just as he can endure the gentle teasing from the Matsuokas during the car ride back.
Rin’s always worth it.