“What if he shows up with another woman? What if one of my sleeves catches on fire and it spreads rapidly? What if instead of mints I accidentally pop a couple of Ambien and I have to keep punching my leg to stay awake?”
“Okay, I know you’re drawing on all your ridiculous past date mishaps, but I think the fire thing was actually my fault,” Suga says. “I mean, I didn’t do it on purpose, and you tried to tell me it wasn’t a fake candle.”
Daichi doesn’t seem to hear Suga, thinking back on his own first date with Asahi. “Wait, that was why you kept punching yourself?”
Asahi puts his face in his hands and groans. “Somehow, it’s going to be a disaster.”
“Do you have any flame retardant clothing…?” Suga asks slowly, wandering over to Asahi’s closet as if he’ll be able to tell.
“Give me the Ambien,” Daichi demands, holding out his hand. “Why do you even bring it with you?”
Asahi fishes it out of his pocket reluctantly. “I try to be prepared.”
“For naptime?” his friends asks incredulously. “You don’t need it.” He sets the bottle on the desk, and after a second, nudges it a little further away as if he thinks Asahi might make a sudden grab for it, or as if the added distance might stop him.
Suga gives up on looking though his shirts and wanders back over, slapping his hands down on Asahi’s shoulders suddenly and with quite a bit of force. “Asahi, stop worrying. It’s not as if either of us hated you after those…frankly quite awful dates. We’re your two best friends now. That’s got to be some kind of weird, twisted version of success.”
Daichi pulls his phone out of his pocket. “You should go, it’s a quarter till seven.”
“Do you want us to follow you? With a fire extinguisher?”
“And an adrenaline shot?”
“What would we do if he showed up with another woman?”
“Spray her with the fire extinguisher?”
“Ooh, good idea.”
Asahi stands up and sighs. “Both of you, please stay at least a hundred meters away from us.”
Suga circles around to stand next to Daichi. “What if you want to come back to…?” He glances at Daichi, who snickers.
“It’s the first date!” Asahi protests, reddening.
The other two exchange a look.
“Oh my god, I’m leaving.”
“You’ll do fine,” Daichi says to him with a nod. He’s actually being sincere.
Suga grins and gives him two thumbs up. “Go get ‘im!”
---
Noya doesn’t show up with another woman. The restaurant they go to is free of candles, fake or otherwise. And the mints he has in his pocket do not put him to sleep, and even come in handy.
FILL: TEAM AKAASHI KEIJI/BOKUTO KOUTAROU/KUROO TETSUROU, G
Words: 468
“What if he shows up with another woman? What if one of my sleeves catches on fire and it spreads rapidly? What if instead of mints I accidentally pop a couple of Ambien and I have to keep punching my leg to stay awake?”
“Okay, I know you’re drawing on all your ridiculous past date mishaps, but I think the fire thing was actually my fault,” Suga says. “I mean, I didn’t do it on purpose, and you tried to tell me it wasn’t a fake candle.”
Daichi doesn’t seem to hear Suga, thinking back on his own first date with Asahi. “Wait, that was why you kept punching yourself?”
Asahi puts his face in his hands and groans. “Somehow, it’s going to be a disaster.”
“Do you have any flame retardant clothing…?” Suga asks slowly, wandering over to Asahi’s closet as if he’ll be able to tell.
“Give me the Ambien,” Daichi demands, holding out his hand. “Why do you even bring it with you?”
Asahi fishes it out of his pocket reluctantly. “I try to be prepared.”
“For naptime?” his friends asks incredulously. “You don’t need it.” He sets the bottle on the desk, and after a second, nudges it a little further away as if he thinks Asahi might make a sudden grab for it, or as if the added distance might stop him.
Suga gives up on looking though his shirts and wanders back over, slapping his hands down on Asahi’s shoulders suddenly and with quite a bit of force. “Asahi, stop worrying. It’s not as if either of us hated you after those…frankly quite awful dates. We’re your two best friends now. That’s got to be some kind of weird, twisted version of success.”
Daichi pulls his phone out of his pocket. “You should go, it’s a quarter till seven.”
“Do you want us to follow you? With a fire extinguisher?”
“And an adrenaline shot?”
“What would we do if he showed up with another woman?”
“Spray her with the fire extinguisher?”
“Ooh, good idea.”
Asahi stands up and sighs. “Both of you, please stay at least a hundred meters away from us.”
Suga circles around to stand next to Daichi. “What if you want to come back to…?” He glances at Daichi, who snickers.
“It’s the first date!” Asahi protests, reddening.
The other two exchange a look.
“Oh my god, I’m leaving.”
“You’ll do fine,” Daichi says to him with a nod. He’s actually being sincere.
Suga grins and gives him two thumbs up. “Go get ‘im!”
---
Noya doesn’t show up with another woman. The restaurant they go to is free of candles, fake or otherwise. And the mints he has in his pocket do not put him to sleep, and even come in handy.
Maybe the third time’s the charm.
I really should watch Parks and Rec wow