Ship: Aomine/Kise + old lady Fandom: Kuroko no Basuke Major Tags: tags omitted Other Tags: tags omitted Word Count: 437 words
I don’t know how this fic got away from me but it definitely did. Also known as: The Fill In Which An Old Lady Berates Aomine
***
To his left, there was the creak of a door opening. Aomine ignored it, fumbling with the key and cursing under his breath as it refused to go in. For a second, he suspected that Kise had given him the wrong key, either as a joke or because he was Kise.
“Excuse me!” A high-pitched, querulous voice said. Aomine looked over to the left to find a wrinkle-faced old lady, dressed in a flower-print gown with fluffy bunny slippers, staring at him severely. “Are you trying to break into that house? I’m with the Neighborhood Watch, you know!”
“There’s a Neighborhood Watch for apartment buildings?” Aomine asked, briefly distracted from his objective.
“Young man, don’t be impertinent,” she said as she pushed up her glasses. “I’ll have you know I started the local branch forty years ago when I first moved in!”
“...” Resisting the urge to do some mental arithmetic to figure out when exactly that was, Aomine said instead, “I’m not trying to be impertinent. I was just curious.”
“And a curious thing it is too that you’re doing!” She lectured, waving her cane at Aomine in a way that made him warily step back in case it slipped out of her hand. “Burglaring a place in broad daylight! Have you no shame? And you such a strong young man too. Why don’t you go out and get work? Are you just too lazy to do a good day’s work?”
“I have a job,” Aomine protested, stung to the core of his lazy soul. “I’m a basketball player.”
She hmphed at that. “A proper job, young man. One with a pension and healthcare. Do you have a pension?”
“I earn six million dollars a year, I don’t need a pension!” Aomine jabbed at the keyhole with the key again, wishing more than ever it would open and get him out of this conversation.
“A likely story,” she said. “And who’s paying you that much to throw a ball around?”
“The NBA!” Aomine nearly wailed the words. Something about bossy women always made him feel like he was dealing with Momoi. This was probably what Momoi would be like when she was old. “Look, please, I just need to get into my boyfriend’s house, it’s his birth--”
“Oh! You’re that Dakky! Ryota’s always talking about you. Such a nice young boy, he is.” The old woman was suddenly all smiles, shuffling forwards. “Here, you have to jiggle the knob a little bit and then hold it upwards while you put the key in.”
“...Thank you,” Aomine said and privately cursed Ryota’s ability to make everyone love him.
FILL: Team The Prince of Tennis, T
Fandom: Kuroko no Basuke
Major Tags: tags omitted
Other Tags: tags omitted
Word Count: 437 words
I don’t know how this fic got away from me but it definitely did. Also known as: The Fill In Which An Old Lady Berates Aomine
***
To his left, there was the creak of a door opening. Aomine ignored it, fumbling with the key and cursing under his breath as it refused to go in. For a second, he suspected that Kise had given him the wrong key, either as a joke or because he was Kise.
“Excuse me!” A high-pitched, querulous voice said. Aomine looked over to the left to find a wrinkle-faced old lady, dressed in a flower-print gown with fluffy bunny slippers, staring at him severely. “Are you trying to break into that house? I’m with the Neighborhood Watch, you know!”
“There’s a Neighborhood Watch for apartment buildings?” Aomine asked, briefly distracted from his objective.
“Young man, don’t be impertinent,” she said as she pushed up her glasses. “I’ll have you know I started the local branch forty years ago when I first moved in!”
“...” Resisting the urge to do some mental arithmetic to figure out when exactly that was, Aomine said instead, “I’m not trying to be impertinent. I was just curious.”
“And a curious thing it is too that you’re doing!” She lectured, waving her cane at Aomine in a way that made him warily step back in case it slipped out of her hand. “Burglaring a place in broad daylight! Have you no shame? And you such a strong young man too. Why don’t you go out and get work? Are you just too lazy to do a good day’s work?”
“I have a job,” Aomine protested, stung to the core of his lazy soul. “I’m a basketball player.”
She hmphed at that. “A proper job, young man. One with a pension and healthcare. Do you have a pension?”
“I earn six million dollars a year, I don’t need a pension!” Aomine jabbed at the keyhole with the key again, wishing more than ever it would open and get him out of this conversation.
“A likely story,” she said. “And who’s paying you that much to throw a ball around?”
“The NBA!” Aomine nearly wailed the words. Something about bossy women always made him feel like he was dealing with Momoi. This was probably what Momoi would be like when she was old. “Look, please, I just need to get into my boyfriend’s house, it’s his birth--”
“Oh! You’re that Dakky! Ryota’s always talking about you. Such a nice young boy, he is.” The old woman was suddenly all smiles, shuffling forwards. “Here, you have to jiggle the knob a little bit and then hold it upwards while you put the key in.”
“...Thank you,” Aomine said and privately cursed Ryota’s ability to make everyone love him.